i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Randomize
