Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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