So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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