Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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