But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Randomize
