How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
