i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
My dad just said "fuck circus"
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
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