im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Randomize
