i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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