Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
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That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
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