walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
you traded sex for a burrito?
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
I'm both gender and math confused
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
