What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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