i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
