your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize
