But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
