Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
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