Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
