i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
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