Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
