I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
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