just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
operation harelip BJ is a go
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
