Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Randomize
