May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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