all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Randomize
