Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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