If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
