im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.