SEEEEXXX PLEASE
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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