im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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