Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
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