i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
