If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
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