So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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