summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Randomize
