Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
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