I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
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