Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
There's always time for handjobs
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize