dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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