Im at strip club and am horny
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Your topless pictures make me question reality
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
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