please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
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