I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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