It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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