How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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