TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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