life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
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