That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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