Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Randomize
