Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Randomize
