Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
