Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Randomize