My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Did I show you my penis last night?
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize